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Post by Jenny (Reffy) on Jan 25, 2011 16:07:43 GMT -5
Agreed with Zovo: well done! Everything the judges have said has been spot-on ... it's just a bitter-pill to take when you think the story is great but ends up as guessable, weak, over-done (etc!) I'll sure as heck be using the comments to improve with later :] ... and sorry I reacted badly this time. It was mostly beating myself up! Not because you said what you guys did. I really appreciate your guys effort and time! I also appreciate the honesty even if it is lethal, heh.  :] Flowers for judges :] (I ate the biscuit/cookie, sorry. It did help a new muse/poetry piece though!) |
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Mena
Scribe
Posts: 667
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Post by Mena on Jan 25, 2011 16:18:30 GMT -5
Sorry, for whatever reason(s), I am a little sensitive today.
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Post by Kaez on Jan 25, 2011 16:23:34 GMT -5
Sorry, for whatever reason(s), I am a little sensitive today. Anddddddddddddddd I'm a little irreverent today, admittedly. |
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Post by James on Jan 25, 2011 16:27:43 GMT -5
Other than that, you've called me on the right stuff and been quite thorough between the three of you. So I say well done. I actually kind of agree with this. Except on the one thing I discussed with Mel, I've had no problems at all concerning judging on my own pieces. I think you done really well. It's been the other matches where I've occasionally gone "Huh?" But like Pete said... I tend to do that. |
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Post by Manny Nhaims on Jan 25, 2011 20:46:22 GMT -5
To the judges: Indeed, as all of you had noticed , the piece was shortened/ “clipped.” Just to sate your curiosities, I did do this on purpose. I intended, and initially did, write more to it. But after reading the rather graphic instructions on how to properly gut a body, I noticed the piece was going quickly from comically tasteless, to certainly disturbing. And not sure of your sensibilities I withheld the gory stuff. *chuckles* Considering the reviews though, perhaps I should turn this into an actual little project. Again, thanks for the feedback.
Reffy: I wouldn’t worry about facing me. Drall, Kaez, Zovo, I’ve lost to them all before in previous Cups. So I guess my luck this time around is due to wear off, no? Just think of me as some fool standing in your way of getting revenge. Use that to fuel your writing rage! I look forward to seeing what that drive produces. Good writing to you…I’m not gonna risk offering you any precious luck.
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Post by ASGetty ((Zovo)) on Jan 25, 2011 20:58:44 GMT -5
To the judges: Indeed, as all of you had noticed , the piece was shortened/ “clipped.” Just to sate your curiosities, I did do this on purpose. I intended, and initially did, write more to it. But after reading the rather graphic instructions on how to properly gut a body, I noticed the piece was going quickly from comically tasteless, to certainly disturbing. And not sure of your sensibilities I withheld the gory stuff. *chuckles* Considering the reviews though, perhaps I should turn this into an actual little project. Again, thanks for the feedback. Reffy: I wouldn’t worry about facing me. Drall, Kaez, Zovo, I’ve lost to them all before in previous Cups. So I guess my luck this time around is due to wear off, no? Just think of me as some fool standing in your way of getting revenge. Use that to fuel your writing rage! I look forward to seeing what that drive produces. Good writing to you…I’m not gonna risk offering you any precious luck. You sound like a genuinely decent human being. . . I am unaccustomed to this and must distrust/loathe you on principal. I hope you understand. |
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Post by Kaez on Jan 25, 2011 21:12:48 GMT -5
To the judges: Indeed, as all of you had noticed , the piece was shortened/ “clipped.” Just to sate your curiosities, I did do this on purpose. I intended, and initially did, write more to it. But after reading the rather graphic instructions on how to properly gut a body, I noticed the piece was going quickly from comically tasteless, to certainly disturbing. And not sure of your sensibilities I withheld the gory stuff. *chuckles* Considering the reviews though, perhaps I should turn this into an actual little project. Again, thanks for the feedback. Reffy: I wouldn’t worry about facing me. Drall, Kaez, Zovo, I’ve lost to them all before in previous Cups. So I guess my luck this time around is due to wear off, no? Just think of me as some fool standing in your way of getting revenge. Use that to fuel your writing rage! I look forward to seeing what that drive produces. Good writing to you…I’m not gonna risk offering you any precious luck. You sound like a genuinely decent human being. . . I am unaccustomed to this and must distrust/loathe you on principal. I hope you understand. I don't like it when you compliment people. Stop that. That's not the Zovo I know. |
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Post by James on Jan 25, 2011 21:28:19 GMT -5
Considering the reviews though, perhaps I should turn this into an actual little project. Again, thanks for the feedback. If you do, I'll just offer the feedback that Pete and I both decided on when we were discussing it. As Pete pointed out, it was very A Modest Proposal and the one different in style was that it was very informal and unprofessional. It was a conversational tone. Which I think Pete said probably in fact hurt the humour. For a Black Comedy, if you instead went for a strict professional tone that treated your subject with complete seriousness the comedy would have appeared through it far better. *sage nod* |
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Post by Janaril on Jan 25, 2011 21:45:09 GMT -5
If you do, I'll just offer the feedback that Pete and I both decided on when we were discussing it. As Pete pointed out, it was very A Modest Proposal and the one different in style was that it was very informal and unprofessional. It was a conversational tone. Which I think Pete said probably in fact hurt the humour. For a Black Comedy, if you instead went for a strict professional tone that treated your subject with complete seriousness the comedy would have appeared through it far better. *sage nod* More professional... makes Dark Humor better? ... ... ... Nah, don't see it. Looking forwards to reading the rest of your project if you write it, Manny, especially if it's anything like what you put up for the cup. |
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Post by Kaez on Jan 25, 2011 21:59:49 GMT -5
More professional... makes Dark Humor better? ... ... ... Nah, don't see it. ... It's called delivery. If a comedian laughed at every joke he told, the audience wouldn't find it as funny. It makes it seem like he's -trying- to make you laugh. And that's never as funny. You have to tell a joke with a straight face. Seriousness and professionalism make the -lack of seriousness- (what a joke is in the first place) stand out in contrast. It's a fundamental principle of humor. Nothing compliments black comedy more fittingly. I wanted to read this and feel like I was genuinely reading a book that was instructing me on how to do this. The -irony- of it becomes funny, that something so serious and frank would be telling me to do something desperately uncivilized. I would have enjoyed it so much more if the language weren't so informal. If it didn't seem like it was casually trying to make me laugh. Read A Modest Proposal. |
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Post by Janaril on Jan 25, 2011 22:18:01 GMT -5
I have, and it is quite good.
However, a piece does not necessarily have to be 'professional' to be funny, and if you're not careful, you can end up killing the joke that way too, stripping the humor from the piece.
In fact, if the subject matter is darker, a lack of 'professionality' could add to the humor, depending on how it's done.
Just saying, there isn't one 'be all and end all' way to do humor, or any subject, really. If it's 'professional' or not, most of it comes down to the quality of writing.
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Post by Kaez on Jan 25, 2011 22:25:38 GMT -5
I have, and it is quite good. However, a piece does not necessarily have to be 'professional' to be funny, and if you're not careful, you can end up killing the joke that way too, stripping the humor from the piece. In fact, if the subject matter is darker, a lack of 'professionality' could add to the humor, depending on how it's done. Just saying, there isn't one 'be all and end all' way to do humor, or any subject, really. If it's 'professional' or not, most of it comes down to the quality of writing. Oh, yeah, I agree. Entirely subjective. Almost all comedy is. -Here-? I wanted to see some more of that serious, tongue-in-cheek tone and less, 'this is obviously lighthearted'. It's really what stood between me enjoying it and me not enjoying it. |
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Post by James on Jan 25, 2011 23:35:05 GMT -5
I have, and it is quite good. However, a piece does not necessarily have to be 'professional' to be funny, and if you're not careful, you can end up killing the joke that way too, stripping the humor from the piece. In fact, if the subject matter is darker, a lack of 'professionality' could add to the humor, depending on how it's done. Just saying, there isn't one 'be all and end all' way to do humor, or any subject, really. If it's 'professional' or not, most of it comes down to the quality of writing. Oh, yeah, I agree. Entirely subjective. Almost all comedy is. -Here-? I wanted to see some more of that serious, tongue-in-cheek tone and less, 'this is obviously lighthearted'. It's really what stood between me enjoying it and me not enjoying it. Yeah, comedy as a whole is an entirely subjective genre, which is always going to make it a difficult thing to judge for things like these. But, I completely agree with Pete. Having it less professional might not have affected the humour of the piece, but it certainly did affect the 'blackness' of the Black Comedy. |
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Post by Jenny (Reffy) on Jan 26, 2011 3:16:11 GMT -5
Reffy: I wouldn’t worry about facing me. Drall, Kaez, Zovo, I’ve lost to them all before in previous Cups. So I guess my luck this time around is due to wear off, no? Just think of me as some fool standing in your way of getting revenge. Use that to fuel your writing rage! I look forward to seeing what that drive produces. Good writing to you…I’m not gonna risk offering you any precious luck. D'aaaaaaaaaaaw! Dude <3 Much love. Especially that last line! I don't consider myself a good writer but that provided fuzzy feelings. :] Good luck to you as well (not that you need it!) |
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Post by James on Jan 26, 2011 22:51:23 GMT -5
Well, I've got a start underway.
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