|
|
Post by ASGetty ((Zovo)) on Mar 14, 2016 12:50:59 GMT -5
Spent some time this weekend trying to re-work the Sophia the Grief Robot story (tentatively titled: "The Newer Model") and I am just having a hell of a time with it. The more I think about it, the more I like the idea of it, but I cannot, for the life of me, figure out where the correct ending is. I think it's because I can't really decide what the primary focus of the story is.
Is it Daniel's Birthday? Is it Cara's emotional rollercoaster? Is it simply the reveal/twist of Sophia being a robot?
And, then, where's is the ending for each of those? If it's about Daniel's birthday, I'd want to get Sophia home and see his reaction.
If it's just the reveal/twist, I'd slice it off before they leave the store.
If it's Cara (which I feel is the best of the three options) I'd want to end it...............................? I dunno, I have no idea how to resolve that conflict.
|
|
|
|
Post by J.O.N ((Dragonwing)) on Mar 15, 2016 6:22:26 GMT -5
If it is about Sophia being a robot, having it end when she notices the cold would be good. Not sure about the others.
|
|
|
|
Post by James on Mar 15, 2016 14:06:57 GMT -5
If it's Cara (which I feel is the best of the three options) I'd want to end it...............................? I dunno, I have no idea how to resolve that conflict. I kind of think that story has to be resolved in an unhappy way. I know we're both fans of happy endings, but when I read it and Cara said "Daniel is gonna love it", my response was instinctively "no, he won't." I feel like if the story is about Cara, who seems to have at least moved on a bit, the story ends either in two ways: - Daniel realises he needs to move on and the model is taken away (the upgrade being the jolt he needs). Cara and Daniel can move on together. Which actually isn't unhappy at all. Ignore my first sentence of this post. - Cara deciding she needs to get out of there for her own sanity. I don't know, I felt like after all those hints about this being an unusual case, about Cara being okay, about it being Daniel who needs the robot, I'm not sure Cara's story can end in a satisfying way with her going "this new model is great!". |
|
|
|
Post by ASGetty ((Zovo)) on Mar 15, 2016 15:24:48 GMT -5
If it's Cara (which I feel is the best of the three options) I'd want to end it...............................? I dunno, I have no idea how to resolve that conflict. I kind of think that story has to be resolved in an unhappy way. I know we're both fans of happy endings, but when I read it and Cara said "Daniel is gonna love it", my response was instinctively "no, he won't." I feel like if the story is about Cara, who seems to have at least moved on a bit, the story ends either in two ways: - Daniel realises he needs to move on and the model is taken away (the upgrade being the jolt he needs). Cara and Daniel can move on together. Which actually isn't unhappy at all. Ignore my first sentence of this post. - Cara deciding she needs to get out of there for her own sanity. I don't know, I felt like after all those hints about this being an unusual case, about Cara being okay, about it being Daniel who needs the robot, I'm not sure Cara's story can end in a satisfying way with her going "this new model is great!". Yeah, and I agree with the bulk of that. Cara is, for the most part, okay. The death of her daughter is still painful to her, but she's getting on with her life. Daniel, though, has sort of put his life on hold. He's unable to let go and that's why he's glommed on to the surrogate so completely (to the point where he's cooking it meals that it won't eat). Cara, I think, has been reluctantly humoring it all for years now, but to her, having a replica of her little girl around the house is haunting her. So, maybe the aging upgrade will help her as well? Since Sophia no longer appears locked in time? I just feel like there's a lot more story to tell, but it'd be long and boring and not much happening. |
|
|
|
Post by Injin on Mar 17, 2016 0:17:02 GMT -5
I still want to keep my promise regarding the whole "Will be in the King of the Recluse" competition thing. I'm still brainstorming ideas and I think I'll settle on something soon. I hope.
|
|
|
|
Post by James on Mar 17, 2016 1:43:40 GMT -5
I still want to keep my promise regarding the whole "Will be in the King of the Recluse" competition thing. I'm still brainstorming ideas and I think I'll settle on something soon. I hope. Oh. I thought you had already started something. |
|
|
|
Post by Injin on Mar 17, 2016 12:04:27 GMT -5
I still want to keep my promise regarding the whole "Will be in the King of the Recluse" competition thing. I'm still brainstorming ideas and I think I'll settle on something soon. I hope. Oh. I thought you had already started something. I started disliking it a lot after getting a little bit into the writing process. So I started over. I hope I'll be able to get something in by the 25th or so. |
|
|
|
Post by James on Mar 17, 2016 14:09:43 GMT -5
Best hope that no one swoops in and steals the challenger spot.
|
|
|
|
Post by Injin on Mar 17, 2016 20:00:20 GMT -5
Best hope that no one swoops in and steals the challenger spot. Its starting to look like I won't find anything. Every idea I've come up with is immediately brought down by me actually writing it out. But that doesn't mean I won't stop trying. I'll figure something out. |
|
|
|
Post by ASGetty ((Zovo)) on Mar 17, 2016 20:01:43 GMT -5
But that doesn't mean I won't stop trying. ? |
|
|
|
Post by Injin on Mar 17, 2016 20:10:09 GMT -5
But that doesn't mean I won't stop trying. ? Writing something until I can get something to stick. I am discouraged, but that doesn't mean I won't try. I'm pretty much writing here to say how my writing's going. |
|
|
|
Post by James on Mar 17, 2016 20:24:24 GMT -5
Best hope that no one swoops in and steals the challenger spot. Its starting to look like I won't find anything. Every idea I've come up with is immediately brought down by me actually writing it out. Talk to me. What ideas are you thinking of. Let's jam, Injin. |
|
|
|
Post by Injin on Mar 17, 2016 20:31:38 GMT -5
Its starting to look like I won't find anything. Every idea I've come up with is immediately brought down by me actually writing it out. Talk to me. What ideas are you thinking of. Let's jam, Injin. We are competitors James. Lets not make this weird. No wait, I'm the one making this weird. So my ideas are generally Swamp related. Right now I'm in the midst of a weird POV sort of writing storm. Not very long yet, but its getting nice and stupid. I'm sure people don't like it when the story is literally talking to you. Because I suck at that. EDIT: I am considering more deletion. Fantastic. |
|
|
|
Post by James on Mar 17, 2016 20:37:13 GMT -5
Talk to me. What ideas are you thinking of. Let's jam, Injin. We are competitors James. I'm going to change the name of all future "AWR competitions" to "AWR play areas where nobody wins or loses, well, okay they do, but it doesn't mean much because we should all be helping everyone". Well, if you're still getting stuck, you could always try one of the other prompts. There's a lot to work with. I don't know what these sentences mean. |
|
|
|
Post by Injin on Mar 17, 2016 20:43:05 GMT -5
We are competitors James. I'm going to change the name of all future "AWR competitions" to "AWR play areas where nobody wins or loses, well, okay they do, but it doesn't mean much because we should all be helping everyone". Well, if you're still getting stuck, you could always try one of the other prompts. There's a lot to work with. I don't know what these sentences mean. You are absolutely right about that much. Well, I was actually stuck on other prompts before. I was considering looking back at my old works, but none of them merited....revisiting. As for the historical fiction, I am doing enough research for my student stuff as it is. Bad Science? I suck at regular science and my ideas for that weren't interesting enough. And I wasn't really interested in the Wrecker one, to be honest. Its not what I'm mentally into right now. I am not in the best mental mindspace at the moment. I'm feeling a cranial malaise of sorts. Perhaps that is boiling over into everything else, but w/e. I am continuing to revise and fix what I've written. I had a good thing going and then I went all...Injin goes off on a weird writing tangent weird. |
|
