Foresight

[ARSmith ((Wolfeh))]

Thank you, ma'am. ^^

[AEShenhav (Ali)]

Overall Wolfie, I'd say it's pretty dang good. I had to wait until I was sixteen or seventeen before I got decent with poetry. So you's got a head start.

Now to business.

Dark-lit lights flicker dimly in my mind,
No hope left to open my eyes.
I feel lost, yet found, seen, sought.
What is this image appearing in my mind?

Paints a solid start. It ties into the title in saying what could be coming as opposed to what is. I especially like the second line.

Trees of fiery rue, raging in an unextinguished fire, red with anger,
Skies of black brightening with the flash of lightening.
I see nothing more but hate and destruction,
Aching to escape through me, as if begging in a seductive manner, leaving me breathless.

The first line should be stronger in my opinion. Instead of 'unextingushed fire,' maybe consider something more. To me all it says is an elongated version of the word 'fire.'

Winded, the image flashes, a boom of thunder echoing through the bows of my head.
I hear screams. Dying, writhing screams.
This isn't real, it can't be,
Is this really a future worth coming to?
Nay, it cannot be!

The panic in this stanza feels good and real. I likes it. It also brings life into the poem, though it seems that life's going to end... soon.

I feel my hands clutch onto cloth, eyes springing open in utter despair.
I shouted out, letting go my own scream. A dream? A nightmare?
Sweat beaded my forehead, hair-rim dampened to the brink.
I felt weak, muscles tense, felt my heart throb in fast paced beats.

This is good, the beginning suggests being one amongst others in panic and pain. That's good, but it feels like there should be more of it. By the end, it already feels like the poem is winding down.

It felt so real... like it would happen.
This gift, this curse of foresight, of sheer distaste,
What if... what if it's real?
What if we cannot change what I've seen?

And there it is. The end is good and brings us back to the present, letting the reader contemplate whether seeing the future is a good or bad thing. The second line is very good.

In an overall sense, the only thing I could say is that I wished it would go on just a little longer. The vagueness is good, it helps the reader paint a literal picture of their own, adding in what they view as 'The End,' as it were.

Well done, Wolfie. Keep it up.