Poem/Musing/Feelings - not sure

[Jenny (Reffy)]

Feelings, anger, upset, confusion.
Identity crises, perhaps.
Laughter, doesn't mean much now.
Friendships, gone, forgotten, destroyed.
Why should I help?
Why should I be the one to help?
Why when nobody says thanks any more?
When some can so easily forget?
Anger, too harsh to settle.
Gone in a second.
Tears cried too many times.
Gone without a single thought.

Life sucks. People suck.
Always the friendly people.
Never the bad.
The nice, caring people.
Crushed like daisies before a thundering gale.
What does it matter?
You did the right thing.
So then why feel bad?
Why the hurt? the tears? the upset?
Why the regret at harsh words spoken?
Spoken in anger.
Withdrawn by tears.

Same old, same old.
The show must go on. Merry little round-about.
God never gives any body more than they can handle.
That saying is wrong.
Life is wrong. Learning to live is wrong.
Why bother? Why even bother?
Anything you do will be gone in a flash.
Its not like it makes a difference.
Never a difference.
Are friends really true friends?
Is it better to be nice and trampled on?
Or spiteful, nasty and lonely?

Who am I? Soft and strong?
I am trampled and weak.
Anger. Hot, fueled, fire. Quick.
Feeling so small. So stupid.
I never asked or wanted for this.
What ifs? Can't live by what ifs?
Give up. Let go. Move on.
Yet it lingers, it stays.
The hurt. The wrong.
Why does it not heal?
Why can I not heal it?
Why does it not go away?


((Not sure what this is ... got a lot of upset feelings running around right now. Figured I should sit down and get it on paper. Drama is fun kiddies. Kinda feels better to get it all out on paper. I suppose it could be a poem ... but its more me talking too myself.))

[The Timeless One]

((...Holy...shit...

Again, why do you always say the most amazing, beautiful things when I'm listening to epic music? I felt your pain for the whole 30 seconds I was reading it.

I'll be your friend ))

[Jenny (Reffy)]

heh - thanks I calmed down a little since then kinda really helped just to put it all out there.

Thank you for being my friend ;D

[The Timeless One]

You are quite velcome.

I feel like being German today.

[zulazza]

That was outstanding; a fine piece of work if ever I have read one. The pain, the emotion... I felt it all vivid and real the entire time I was reading. Two thumbs up, mate. Two thumbs way up.

[Jenny (Reffy)]

*blush* Thank you Zulkit

It was real emotion when I wrote it. Doesn't hurt so much any more, in fact now I kind of laugh at it. Interesting looking back though

[zulazza]

Jun 1, 2009 14:14:35 GMT -5 Jenny (Reffy) said:

*blush* Thank you Zulkit

It was real emotion when I wrote it. Doesn't hurt so much any more, in fact now I kind of laugh at it. Interesting looking back though

I laugh at the stuff I write when I'm emotional, etc. too. Of course, I don't have the nerve to post any of that stuff here. >>;;

And, Drall, you can have a couple of points on meh meter for checkin' out this poem.

Then you lose them for faking a german accent.

[Jenny (Reffy)]

Jun 3, 2009 21:02:27 GMT -5 @zulazza said:

I laugh at the stuff I write when I'm emotional, etc. too. Of course, I don't have the nerve to post any of that stuff here. >>;;

You should post it in here - some where! The emotional work. Its very powerful and usually awesome

[zulazza]

Jun 4, 2009 12:48:03 GMT -5 Jenny (Reffy) said:

Jun 3, 2009 21:02:27 GMT -5 @zulazza said:

I laugh at the stuff I write when I'm emotional, etc. too. Of course, I don't have the nerve to post any of that stuff here. >>;;

You should post it in here - some where! The emotional work. Its very powerful and usually awesome

I might. ^^