Post by Arlyan on Apr 14, 2009 21:33:48 GMT -5
((Hello everyone, this is a snippet of a story I'm currently working on, and I was looking to get some feedback on it.))
The elves, exhausted from their travels through the dark, winding caverns, emerged into the forest. The air had a strange taste to it, and in the darkness, the elves marveled at the colossal trees. Through the branches, they could see the pinpricks of light. Could this be the source of energy Ellandrieal spoke of? The elves whispered to themselves.
Ellandrieal walked briskly through the forest, as though searching for something, with the other elves following after him. Their dark skin and white hair sharply contrasted the dull night around them, and the animals in the forest were silent, watching these new creatures prowl through their territory.
Ellandrieal himself was worried. Where is it? The light was here, is always here.
Ellandrieal, several months ago, had evaded some of the sentries the Elders placed around the edges of their vast underground kingdom, lost himself in the twisting caverns, and come near an exit to the outside world. The light was blinding, intoxicating, and powerful.
Ellandrieal, who had just began his studies as a shadowmage, instantly found himself stripped of his command of shadows, and felt his entire being suffused with unfathomable power. He stumbled out of the light, and made his way back to the shadow elves’ city, his eyes struggling to work in the darkness after their initial shock. Enthralled with this new power, he went straight to his shadowmaster, telling him of his discovery.
His master, however, was aghast at the discovery of Ellandrieal’s deed, and sent him away. Confused, decided to make his way to the Elder’s palace, only to discover his master had beat him to it. A battalion of the Elder’s chief guard, led by Ellandrieal’s master himself, charged Ellandireal, intent on killing him on the spot. Without his newfound power, he would have been struck down where he stood. Without thought, it seemed, he called forth the power, and fire rained from the darkness onto the assailants, incinerating man of them, screams of pain echoing in the cavern. The few left relatively unscathed were blinded by the brightness, allowing Ellandrieal time to escape.
He hid in the complicated network of tunnels that connected the dark elves’ massive kingdom, occasionally sneaking upward, to glean more power from the light that poured into the caverns, and taking time to gather a following. Many dark elves were fascinated with Ellandireal’s newfound magics, the intricate, subtle shadow magic paling in comparison to the powerful, radiant magic of light and fire that Ellandrieal had discovered. Ellandrieal’s closest friend, Rassellyc, went on behalf of the growing group, asking to be allowed to study these new magics, for many were fearful to give up their ties to shadowmagic without being accepted by the Elders, and no one wanted to damn themselves as Ellandrieal had done.
It had been increasingly difficult for Ellandrieal to sneak to the light, the Elders, suspecting the growing supporters, mostly the younger elves, to Ellandrieal’s cause, began posting more and more guards to protect the exits of the cavern, fearful of Ellandrieal’s growing power. Soon there were small armies at each exit. Undaunted, Ellandrieal crept past time and time again, learning more and more of the secrets of light.
Days after Rassellyc had gone to the Elders to plead Ellandrieal’s case, Rassellyc’s body was found hanging in the city square, broken and bloody. The Elders had tortured Rassellyc and hung him out as a warning to others who would follow Ellandrieal’s path.
Enraged, Ellandrieal and his followers gathered, and, with Ellandrieal leading the way, proceded to blast their way through most of the city, and an entire battalion guarding the an exit.
Thus, the found themselves outside, further than Ellandrieal had ever been, though there was no sign of the light that fueled Ellandrieal’s powers.
The group wandered for several hours, before collapsing on a small hillock. Ellandrieal paced, wondering what had happened to his source of power, it had been there ceaselessly before, the power was too much for him to venture out this far to find trees and the like, however.
Stone and darkness were all his kind small band of dark elves had ever known.
Then, Ellandrieal perked up, his eyes seeming to glow in exhultation. The exhausted elves looked to him, startled.
“It’s coming,” Ellandrieal whispered, his voice filled with tense excitement, his eyes focused on the distant horizon.
The other elves stood, their dark forms looking as one to the spot on the horizon Ellandrieal was focused.
Ellandrieal had never been in direct contact with the extreme light, and worried that the pure power would strike him and his fellows down, but he knew they were trapped, too far from any deep, dark cavern to hide in.
So instead, he stood, opening himself to the coming light, the power of it already coursing through his veins.
And then, a sliver of raw power, more intense than anything the elves had ever thought, rose above the horizon, quickly growing in size. Ellandrieal stood, glorifying in the sheer power, he felt it pouring through every fiber of his being, filling him with power, the sheer ecstasy of it was overwhelming.
Around him, the light tore into those far less experienced than he in the ways of flame and light, and many, out of reflex, reached for their fleeting shadow magic for protection, only to have it ripped forcibly from their minds, breaking them. Others, having listened to Ellandrieal’s explanations of the light, opened themselves, willfully allowing their feeble shadow magic to be blown from them, allowing the light to suffuse their being. The explosion of power blossoming in their minds and bodies, they quickly dropped, blinded by the light in front of them, and inside them as well. Ellandrieal dropped as well, not much after his companions, overcome by the rising sun.
When the sun reached its zenith, the elves began to stir. Ellandrieal opened his eyes, the world a different place. The glorious light illuminated everything, brilliant greens glared from the trees and grass, the sky a blue unlike anything he had ever seen before. And the sun, high above, bathed the prone elves in power and glory unlike anything they had ever felt. Ellandrieal’s body pulsed with the light of the sun, he felt the limitless power running through him, flowing.
Looking at his companions, he saw they had all changed. Gone was their dark skin, the sun had driven out all traces of shadow from their minds and bodies. Their skin was golden, their hair brilliantly blonde, their eyes, once white, now glowed with the golden energy that inhabited their bodies. Ellandrieal stood, helping another elf beside him to stand, and the rest of his followers stood with them, marveling at their transformation. But there were some of their group that hadn’t risen, their bodies twisted on the ground, their skin a patchwork of dark and light, victims of their own hesitance to embrace the light.
All the efforts Ellandrieal and the others made to revive them were useless, the fallen elves lay as if dead, though their shallow breathing said otherwise.
Unnerved by the proximity of the fallen, the Ellandrieal and the other transformed elves traveled from that place, laughing and bounding with their energies. Ellandrieal smiled. It was the dawn of a new age.
((Again, thank you for taking the time to read this, and please hit me with any comments, criticism, speculations, feelings, etc.))
The elves, exhausted from their travels through the dark, winding caverns, emerged into the forest. The air had a strange taste to it, and in the darkness, the elves marveled at the colossal trees. Through the branches, they could see the pinpricks of light. Could this be the source of energy Ellandrieal spoke of? The elves whispered to themselves.
Ellandrieal walked briskly through the forest, as though searching for something, with the other elves following after him. Their dark skin and white hair sharply contrasted the dull night around them, and the animals in the forest were silent, watching these new creatures prowl through their territory.
Ellandrieal himself was worried. Where is it? The light was here, is always here.
Ellandrieal, several months ago, had evaded some of the sentries the Elders placed around the edges of their vast underground kingdom, lost himself in the twisting caverns, and come near an exit to the outside world. The light was blinding, intoxicating, and powerful.
Ellandrieal, who had just began his studies as a shadowmage, instantly found himself stripped of his command of shadows, and felt his entire being suffused with unfathomable power. He stumbled out of the light, and made his way back to the shadow elves’ city, his eyes struggling to work in the darkness after their initial shock. Enthralled with this new power, he went straight to his shadowmaster, telling him of his discovery.
His master, however, was aghast at the discovery of Ellandrieal’s deed, and sent him away. Confused, decided to make his way to the Elder’s palace, only to discover his master had beat him to it. A battalion of the Elder’s chief guard, led by Ellandrieal’s master himself, charged Ellandireal, intent on killing him on the spot. Without his newfound power, he would have been struck down where he stood. Without thought, it seemed, he called forth the power, and fire rained from the darkness onto the assailants, incinerating man of them, screams of pain echoing in the cavern. The few left relatively unscathed were blinded by the brightness, allowing Ellandrieal time to escape.
He hid in the complicated network of tunnels that connected the dark elves’ massive kingdom, occasionally sneaking upward, to glean more power from the light that poured into the caverns, and taking time to gather a following. Many dark elves were fascinated with Ellandireal’s newfound magics, the intricate, subtle shadow magic paling in comparison to the powerful, radiant magic of light and fire that Ellandrieal had discovered. Ellandrieal’s closest friend, Rassellyc, went on behalf of the growing group, asking to be allowed to study these new magics, for many were fearful to give up their ties to shadowmagic without being accepted by the Elders, and no one wanted to damn themselves as Ellandrieal had done.
It had been increasingly difficult for Ellandrieal to sneak to the light, the Elders, suspecting the growing supporters, mostly the younger elves, to Ellandrieal’s cause, began posting more and more guards to protect the exits of the cavern, fearful of Ellandrieal’s growing power. Soon there were small armies at each exit. Undaunted, Ellandrieal crept past time and time again, learning more and more of the secrets of light.
Days after Rassellyc had gone to the Elders to plead Ellandrieal’s case, Rassellyc’s body was found hanging in the city square, broken and bloody. The Elders had tortured Rassellyc and hung him out as a warning to others who would follow Ellandrieal’s path.
Enraged, Ellandrieal and his followers gathered, and, with Ellandrieal leading the way, proceded to blast their way through most of the city, and an entire battalion guarding the an exit.
Thus, the found themselves outside, further than Ellandrieal had ever been, though there was no sign of the light that fueled Ellandrieal’s powers.
The group wandered for several hours, before collapsing on a small hillock. Ellandrieal paced, wondering what had happened to his source of power, it had been there ceaselessly before, the power was too much for him to venture out this far to find trees and the like, however.
Stone and darkness were all his kind small band of dark elves had ever known.
Then, Ellandrieal perked up, his eyes seeming to glow in exhultation. The exhausted elves looked to him, startled.
“It’s coming,” Ellandrieal whispered, his voice filled with tense excitement, his eyes focused on the distant horizon.
The other elves stood, their dark forms looking as one to the spot on the horizon Ellandrieal was focused.
Ellandrieal had never been in direct contact with the extreme light, and worried that the pure power would strike him and his fellows down, but he knew they were trapped, too far from any deep, dark cavern to hide in.
So instead, he stood, opening himself to the coming light, the power of it already coursing through his veins.
And then, a sliver of raw power, more intense than anything the elves had ever thought, rose above the horizon, quickly growing in size. Ellandrieal stood, glorifying in the sheer power, he felt it pouring through every fiber of his being, filling him with power, the sheer ecstasy of it was overwhelming.
Around him, the light tore into those far less experienced than he in the ways of flame and light, and many, out of reflex, reached for their fleeting shadow magic for protection, only to have it ripped forcibly from their minds, breaking them. Others, having listened to Ellandrieal’s explanations of the light, opened themselves, willfully allowing their feeble shadow magic to be blown from them, allowing the light to suffuse their being. The explosion of power blossoming in their minds and bodies, they quickly dropped, blinded by the light in front of them, and inside them as well. Ellandrieal dropped as well, not much after his companions, overcome by the rising sun.
When the sun reached its zenith, the elves began to stir. Ellandrieal opened his eyes, the world a different place. The glorious light illuminated everything, brilliant greens glared from the trees and grass, the sky a blue unlike anything he had ever seen before. And the sun, high above, bathed the prone elves in power and glory unlike anything they had ever felt. Ellandrieal’s body pulsed with the light of the sun, he felt the limitless power running through him, flowing.
Looking at his companions, he saw they had all changed. Gone was their dark skin, the sun had driven out all traces of shadow from their minds and bodies. Their skin was golden, their hair brilliantly blonde, their eyes, once white, now glowed with the golden energy that inhabited their bodies. Ellandrieal stood, helping another elf beside him to stand, and the rest of his followers stood with them, marveling at their transformation. But there were some of their group that hadn’t risen, their bodies twisted on the ground, their skin a patchwork of dark and light, victims of their own hesitance to embrace the light.
All the efforts Ellandrieal and the others made to revive them were useless, the fallen elves lay as if dead, though their shallow breathing said otherwise.
Unnerved by the proximity of the fallen, the Ellandrieal and the other transformed elves traveled from that place, laughing and bounding with their energies. Ellandrieal smiled. It was the dawn of a new age.
((Again, thank you for taking the time to read this, and please hit me with any comments, criticism, speculations, feelings, etc.))
