A New Project: An Autumn's Breeze

[Anciel]

An Autumn's Breeze - Working Title

Plot Summary: During the summer, two teens meet and start a homosexual relationship, but when school starts, they can no longer keep the forbidden act secret. Pressured on all sides, their relationship with their friends, family, and themselves is pushed to the limit by a judgmental society.


Main Characters:

Jet Bryant - Jet is a popular high-school jock, who's career in athletics started when his parents pushed him to join the team. He is a softy on the inside, but has to show his dominance by pushing other kids around, something he really doesn't have a heart for but does anyways. He has a hard time accepting this new part of himself, and will go to desperate measures to stop everything from breaking down, but doesn't want to hurt Owen

Owen Kolysco - A reclusive teen, he is trying to get by the best he can despite the fact that his is shunned and looked down upon because of his sexuality. Living in a boarding house, he is coping with the pressure of friends and the loss (figurative) loss of his family.

------

Right now, that's all I have. I am doing this as recently, a good friend of mine was harassed and attacked for her sexuality. In these times, there is the injustice served to these people, something that we brush to the side in an attempt to keep it away. Like the color of your skin, it is not possible for them to fight it, and causes extreme stress on them. I think that things like this are important for our society to see from their point of view, and this ignorant and judgmental society is not giving people their rights, despite the fact that we are all born equal.

So...yea.

[Faerd ((B'slash))]

Sounds interesting, good luck with the project, keep us updated =D

[Lilam]

I'm very much intrigued.

Can't wait to see what you have in store! ;D

[T-DADDY]

bow chika bow wow?

[Anciel]

((Blegh. I just wrote this down, its a much more detailed description of the plot, well then Copy + Paste incoming!))

After a hard year in high-school, all Jet Bryant wants to do is go home and rest for the summer, away from the peer-pressure, work, and friends he had to endure for a year. It seems that his friends bug him every hour of everyday of the summer, until he decides to fake going on vacation for a month and half, to give him some peace and quiet. The plan works and he stays with his older sister and her family, who is kind enough to help him.

Jet soon meets a teenager when he out on an evening sojourn to the nearby park. They talk for awhile and then head their separate ways. Over the next few days, they continue to talk, until Jet invites the boy, over for dinner. When he walks into the house with the mysterious boy, his sister’s fiancé tells them both to leave the house, saying he ‘Doesn’t want some faggot around his children’

Shocked at the turn of events, Jet asks Owen if he is homosexual, which Owen doesn’t deny. Owen invites Jet to stay at the boarding house that he lives in, as his family kicked him out.

Jet agrees and soon meets all the nice people who live there, most of them homosexuals who were kicked out from their homes when they revealed their sexuality. All of them support him and help him ease into the situation at hand. That night, Jet and Owen share a room, and over the next few weeks, a strong relationship builds between them. Jet starts to have feelings for Owen, this mysterious boy who had showed him so much, and had gave him food, water and shelter when he needed it most.

One month until School starts sessions again, Jet confronts Owen about his feelings for him. Owen tells him that is okay, he returns the feelings, and soon they are dating.

In the last month there, Jet does what he could never do under the watchful eyes of His parents, such as learn to play an instrument, something that his father saw as womanish and forbade him from doing. For the rest of the month he becomes great friends with everyone there and becomes part of their ‘family’


Jet soon realizes that he must return home and go back to school, but doesn’t want to leave Owen. Owen then states, much to Jet’s surprise that they go to the same high-school. They decide however to keep their relationship secret in order to keep Jet from harm.

Jet soon returns home and starts the school year anew, but has trouble keeping his mind from wandering to Owen. Owen goes out for varsity track, after training all summer, and Jet is forced into doing varsity football. Both have long practice and almost no longer see each other, but Owen soon starts to come to Jet’s Football practice, which Jet doesn’t mind, at the time being.

A few weeks later, while in the showers ready to go home, Jet’s teammates start joking about “beating up that fag, Owen”. Jet readily stands in his defense, much to his teammate’s surprise. They almost outcast him until Jet gets in a fisticuff with one of them.

Jet starts to ignore Owen, in a last ditch effort to keep things in the status quo. He then visits Owen that night, where Owen starts to believe that he is fooling around with other teammates.

Jet denies this, and soon, one thing leads to another, and Jet wakes up in the bedroom, with Owen beside him. They take the day off to be with each other, and the next day, they decide to confront Jet’s parents.

Jet talks to his parents and introduces Owen to them, and when he says that he is in a relationship with Owen, his mother cries, and his father tells him to get off his property, he isn’t his son anymore.

Jet goes with Owen back to the boarding house, where he has a mental breakdown, but goes to school the next day. He then decides to show public affection towards Owen.

Soon Jet’s and Owen’s lockers are destroyed and vandalized, and Jet’s home is too, spray paint in the words of FAG and DIE all over them. Soon there are signs across the school with their pictures on it, with evil and hating words. Where they spend their days together are vandalized as well.

With everything falling apart around him, Jet almost gives up, and then notices that there is backlash from the people who are sympathetic towards them, and soon there are rivaling groups, the large saying that they are evil and deserve to die. Jet and Owen then decide that together, they have enough money to move another state and live there, they buy their airplane tickets, but disaster happens.

When Owen is training out on the field, he is attack by a mob of teenagers, and is admitted to the hospital. There Jet arrives and sees him badly injured, and as he kisses him, the folk around him are appalled and tell him to leave. The story gets onto the news, and once again there are small protests. He leaves the hospital and has a mental breakdown. He then rejoins his peers by telling large lie, and when Owen recovers and comes back to school, Jet ignores him completely.

Owens is hurt, and decides to leave all the pain behind him. He then decides to head to the airport the next day. Owen goes to the park where they met and ties ribbons around the tree, and leaves a note for Jet pinned to it, proclaiming his love. He then goes and tries to find Jet, but only finds his teammates. He then leaves crying, but drops his ticket. Jet’s teammates realize what harm they had caused and try to find Jet, to no avail.

The next morning Jet walks by the park and decides to go up to the tree where they met. He sees the note left by Owen and then decides to reconcile with him. He rushes to the boarding house where it seems everyone had left to see Owen off.

Jet then runs, faster than he ever had, until his teammates stop him. Jet walks up to him, and to their surprise, they offer him the ticket Owen dropped. He rips it apart, and they, emboldened by his will to keep Owen, race to the airport.

On the way there, Jet tries to call Owen, but the people from the boarding house pick up. They realize that they are about to pass each other, and Jet then gets in the head of the boarding’s house police cruiser. He turns on the lights and speeds down the highway towards the airport.

They get there, and Owen is about to board the plane people from both sides lined around him, telling him to leave or to stay. Jet arrives, Owen drops his bags, and the slight protests turn into an all-out riot.

Jet is afraid at first, but when Owen just smiles at him, he runs over to him and embraces him, forgetting about the world around him, for only their love matters. They then run out together when they riots start to hurl things at them. They run out the doors, and know that the world they live in has been changed for the better, because of their love.

A year later they have finished repairing the damage caused by their love, and Jet goes home to his family, who is finally accepting of his homosexuality, with Owen this time, and they toast to the one thing that matters, love.

[Lilam]

Other than the fact that it was written in present tense (sorry, it makes me cringe, but that's just a personal preference), it seems like you know where you're headed with the plot, so now just leaves the fun part. Writing all of it down.

[Anciel]

Hehe, I'm starting. Since I posted that I got about 4 pages down. Also, I'm thinking about switching Jet Bryant's name around Bryant Jet. Just sounds better to me.

[Anciel]

Alrighty then! First Chapter is done. This is about 11 pages if it is down to book size, 4 1/2 X 6 size paper. There are probably a good amount of mistakes, but tell me what you think. Last time I really wrote was November of 2007.
==============================

Chapter One : The things that drive you insane.


The grounds of Atlas High-School were quiet, the warm summer air a sharp contrast to the cool hallways and rooms. Each class room door repeatedly opened and closed, anxious teens ready to dash out the door at any moment.

Hundreds of eyes gazed upon the clocks in each room, until finally the clock turned and the bells rang throughout the school. Outside, the once peaceful grounds were soon filled with loud and raucous teenagers, scrambling to get away from the dreaded textbooks, tests and worries that existed in any teenager’s life.

The streets surrounding the school were soon filled, as cars, buses, and teens on foot slowly made their ways home for the summer break. All except for Jet Bryant.

He was probably the most popular kid amongst the jocks and cheerleaders, the halfback on the varsity football team, and voted most athletic in the school. Who could ask for more? The only problem was that he had to keep his status as the leader, and often got into trouble, mainly for fights and disrespect to his teachers.

Sitting once again inside the front office, waiting to be called to go and explain why he got into a fight with a freshman earlier that day.

He twiddled his thumbs, looking around the room he was in for thousandth time this year. The walls were pallid and bare, and the room was the same except for the desk that the secretary sat at, and a few chairs sprinkled around the room, where trouble makers like him could sit without talking to other trouble makers. He was, unluckily, the only one beside the secretary inside the rather expansive room.

He stared longingly through the window beside him, watching as his friends got into their hotrod and drove off. He sighed and started to think of an excuse so he could go home before the evening.

The clock slowly ticked away the time as he thought of an excuse, until finally the gilded gold handle on the nearby door opened to reveal Mrs. Barov, the principle and ruling hand in the entire school. Her maple eyes flicked to Jet as she beckoned him into her office.

“Sit anywhere you like Jet.” She said as she walked behind her large oak desk, and sat down. She turned her computer’s monitor off and then stared at him for a second before speaking again.

“You know why you are here, yes?”

Jet smiled and replied, “Yes, ma’am.”

“And what is that reason?” Mrs. Barov said this as she pulled out an array of papers and a pen and started to scribble down the information to write him up.

“I punched a freshman in the face at lunch, ma’am”

“And why did you act so brashly, Jet?” ,her eyes glared at him for a second before dropping back down to the paperwork.

Jet sighed and then said, “He was going to slash the tires to my truck”

Mrs. Barov gave him a questioning look, deciding whether or not to believe his story. She then scribbled down a few more things and then said, “Great. You’re still going to be written up, but we can get to that next year.” She put the papers into a file and then spoke again, “Until then, try not to, do anything like this again.”

She then waved her hand, signaling for him to leave. He walked out and closed the door, a massive grin spread across his face. He grabbed his backpack before dashing outside.


He walked outside into the heavy, heat-laden summer air, the sounds of birds loud and steady in the air. Jet ran across the blacktop to his white truck, threw his backpack into the dirty bed, and got in. He turned the key three times before the engine gave a lower guttural sound and started. The truck was old, but it worked.

The warm air blanketed the town, and as he drove home he punched the air conditioner and turned on the radio, some crappy music station, but anything to keep him entertained, he rolled down his window and watched as the sun beat down on the sand.

He drove slowly, enjoying each small bump and hole in the blacktop, the breeze flying through his blonde hair that was like a mane around his head. He pulled around the corner and drove through his neighborhood, kids were playing outside, old men stood outside with no shirts, watering the grass, and women sat on their porches drinking their tea and gossiping.

Jet screeched his truck to a stop in front of his house and slowly drove onto the driveway. He turned the ignition off and stepped out of the car and enjoyed the silence

He reached inside the back of the truck and got his backpack and opened the door to his house and went inside. No one was home, so he dumped his pack on the floor, got the remote and turned the TV on.

Jet’s mind strayed off, the kid really didn’t deserved being hit, but he couldn’t be seen as weak amongst his friends.

It started when he was kid; his parents made him join the YAHTZE team. His heart was never really into it, but every day he was driven out to the field to practice for grueling hours, and each night he would come home exhausted.

He really wanted to play an instrument, but his choice, the flute, was looked as womanish by his father, and forbade him from joining the kid’s band.

He tried to keep on top of his homework, do well in school, but it never really worked, he was always doing something since he was a kid, and could never find time for himself.

Ever since the third grade when he got into a fight with a fifth grader, for stealing a first grader’s lunch money, and then calling him stupid, he had been ‘cool’ and respected as a thug and leader. Ever since, his friends came to him to take out other thugs and bullies until he found out that he himself had transformed into something that he fought so hard to get rid of.

A vicious circle kept happening, and it was driving him to the edge. He would fight to stay cool, and the only way to stay cool was to fight. The one time he backed out of a fight, he was called a pussy for the rest of the year, until he knocked a freshman out in a single hit.

He jerked himself back into reality, and decided that he wanted something to eat. He went into the kitchen and grabbed a bag of chips, and sat back down and watched what ever crap he turned to.

He put his legs up on the coffee table and was at peace for only a few seconds, until his cell phone went berserk in his pocket.

Startled, he flipped open the phone, and not much to his surprise, it was his friends.

“Hey man! Wanna go see a movie later?”

Jet looked at his watch, and then said, “Uhhh, can’t. Sorry, got some things to do.”

He hung up the phone, everyday they wanted to do something different, and half the time it was illegal.

Outside was hotter than the surface of the sun, but what would you expect in the middle of a desert? It was bone-dry for miles around and they little town they lived in was an Oasis for travelers heading towards California.

Jet had lived here for most of his life, but the one time he went to Northern California, he had the time of his life. The sun was warm, and the breeze was cool, unlike the hot and dry winds that crashed against the houses in the spring. Whatever small amount of rain they got was gone in an instant and the next day it looked like it never rained at all.

Jet had an Uncle, who lived up in California, but he could never live with them, his parents wouldn’t allow it. They were always hounding him it seemed, yelling and chastising him for some small error in their perfect little world.

Only his mother ever really cared for him, his father was always telling him to be man, and stick up for himself. He would strike him when he was younger, and if he found him crying, he would hit him again. His mother however would stand up for him, but she was normally driven down too, berated and struck by this overpowering force.

They cried together when he would leave, and never tell anyone of their plight. Nothing could save them from him.

They would be gone however each night, to go to a lavish party, a neighborhood gathering, or at a casino gambling away their money.

It sickened Jet, they would end up in debt and his father would take out his rage on his wife, and the only time he was ever happy was when Jet came home with a MVP title or another.

But in these hours when they were away he could do what he liked, and his father did make enough money to buy them a nice house, whatever they really wanted, and a perfect family.

Jet was just made that all this had to happen to him, he didn’t care if he was poor, and all he wanted was to get out of the vicious circle that was his life.

The next hours went roughly the same, Jet would think and watch whatever program was on the Television, and then go to the bathroom, get something to drink or get another snack.

At six, he got up from this routine. He went upstairs grabbed a bag with all his equipment and then went back to the school.

He drove to the Gymnasium, a separate building from the main campus and took the bag from the bed of the truck, and went inside.

He took off his clothes, got his gear on, and walked out onto the field, surrounded by other football players. The coach went through his daily routine of calling role, and then a small speech about how well they were going to do this year, just as they had the past year, and the year before. These ‘motivational’ speeches were not why they kept winning. It was all because he wore them down each day, until the worst they could do was the best other teams could do.

Even though most of them had been doing this their entire life, they still groaned and moaned after each exercise. 100 push-ups, three laps around the track, 100 jumping-jacks, 100 crunches, and all other assortments of things, all in full gear.

It wasn’t until the final few minutes that they did a single play, before practice ended. Jet walked back into the locker-room, this time tired and sore. He once again undressed and got into the showers.

The other guys would talk about their girlfriends, how big their junk was, and gossip like old women. Jet would just do his business, and leave before he was drawn into that conversation again.

He left the locker rooms first, but was in no rush to get home. He checked his phone as he was driving home, three more calls from his friends and about a hundred text messages asking what he was doing and if he had plans that night.

The only thing he could look forwards to each night was feast that his mother would make, and If there were guests, the extravaganza of food that seemingly poured from the walls.

When Jet got home, he was not surprised to see that his parents were however were not home. He just sighed and went inside.

He went upstairs and turned on his computer. First he checked his email, nothing new but spam, and then he checked the nation-wide news and then spent the rest of the night watching kids fall off things, being idiots. He then read some online forums while listening to some metal bands.

Jet heard the garage open from the floor below, and looked at the clock. Nine o’clock. He got up from his desk and went downstairs.

“Jet, come help get groceries!” his mother yelled from the garage He got up and walked sluggishly over and picked some bags from the back of their Oldsmobile.

After putting the groceries on the island table, he turned the T.V on and started channel surfing. He stopped on a news report.

The reporter on screen had her brown hair tied in a bun behind her head, and she adjusted her glasses before turning to the next camera and saying, “In other news, a gay couple was attacked and almost killed in New York City. Despite the fact that one of the couple was able to overpower his oppressors, police say that the attack is not a hate crime, and people on both sides have come forth offering evidence for and against the decision. Now onto our reporter out on the field..”

The next part he missed as his mother called him. He got up and walked to her, trying to listen to the news as he walked around the counter to her. She was cutting vegetables.

“Jet, I got a call today. Something about you hitting a freshman?”

Jet squirmed uneasily, and spoke, “Yea, it was nothing. “

“Jet, you can’t go around fighting people to get what you want-“

“I beg to differ” his father said, rather loudly, “I say when my kid punches someone, they deserved it.” He then proceeded wrap his arm around Jets shoulders and tug him close before letting him go.

Jet’s mother just shook her head before returning to cutting vegetables. His father then sat down at the couch, and said, “What shit is this?”

“Just the news, Dad”

“Well, they are talking about gay couples that were attacked in New York, only because they are homosexual.”

“That’s horrible” his mother said quickly. His father said slightly louder, “I think they deserved it.”

Jet went upstairs and played a few games before heading downstairs to dinner. His mother made Fajitas for the third time that week.

He ate quickly and answered every question his father asked just as fast, he then excused himself and went upstairs.

Jet jabbed his thumb into the gaming console’s power button, which turned on after a second. He grabbed the controller and started to play Grand Theft Auto IV, he did a few missions and then turned the console off and put the controller down.

He crawled underneath his covers, and stared up at the off-white color ceiling. He yawned, turned over and went to sleep.

[Jimmycricket]

I like the idea itself and your writing is solid, but just some constructive criticism:
Try not to make your characters too extreme. Being the most popular kid in school with an incredibly homophobic/abusive/gambling addicted dad?
I'm just saying tone everyone done about one notch. Instead of 3 calls and 100 texts how about just hanging up and getting one more call/2 more texts? And my dad is homophobic, he wouldn't say something like that. It might be more realistic if he just says "Whatever, I don't understand why a few fags get punched and everyone pisses their pants about it." If you want an extremist father like one that would literally want gays to get beaten, it's gonna be a little bit harder to relate to the story. Also, if you can, make the beating seem a bit more brutal. Try to mention how they were hospitalized or something, I think it'll help spark the homophobic air early.

Also, are you gay? I haven't seen you write the romance scenes but try to make it realistic. If your main character is gay, chances are he's going to be attracted to some of the other football players, but extremely uncomfortable in the showers. That's how most gay people feel in the lockers from what they've told me. As hot as it is, no one wants to be caught staring, so they look down at the ground and enjoy whatever peaks they get. Sure, your character might be a little more confident than that, but my main point is to make him gay. Unless he's a Mary Sue, he's not a straight guy with a perfect body that happens to be a romantic guy and just takes Owen off his feet. He's got his own temptations, desires, imperfections, etc.

Again, you're doing a good job so far and it kept me interested. Just trying to give you more feedback than "It was good." Because thats what I would want =D
Keep posting more, if I'm being too harsh, tell me and I won't respond anymore. Just trying to warn you about the common mistakes author's make. Still better than anything I could write.