Ivory Tower

[Mr. X]

Ivory Tower

Looking down upon us from your glistening structure, your beloved treasury

Looking down below at the crumbling world, from a land of luxury

Singing your hallelujah prayers as we fight the wars of ages past and ages yonder

Forced to cut and bleed as you sit and ponder

Ponder the empty thoughts that fill those white halls

Empty thoughts that fill your hollow bodies, from which you build these walls

Walls that repel and push back the right

While protecting the darkened flame which you label the light

Light decreed in response to grief

Only to fill your gluttony and provide little to our relief

Now those down below may perish in the struggle to survive

But hope will live on and always will thrive

For the true, everlasting ideal of a world without wrong

Will always outlast these ivory walls

Whose treacherous foundation will always decay

Whose inhabitants will stand trial and be forced to pay

For this ivory tower will always stand mark

Of the worst of the evil, the blackest of dark

[Mr. X]

I guess not so good?

[J.O.N ((Dragonwing))]

They're all being lazy. I can't really help with poetry, I suck at writing it, but I would suggest you don't try and force it to rhyme. Poetry doesn't need to rhyme, just have a rhythm.

[Lilam]

I can't really say that I'm a great judge when it comes to poetry, but I liked it. Except the 13th and 14th lines, which suddenly didn't rhyme. Kinda' messed up the flow. Besides that, it had nice imagery and the topic was interesting. Nice work!